Browsing Tag

dark chocolate

Brown Butter and Hazelnut Chocolate Chunk Cookies

Brown Butter and Hazelnut Chocolate Chunk Cookies

I burn, I shiver; out of the sun, and into this shadow.” – Virginia Woolf, ‘The Waves’

It’s the little things that bring joy. Entanglements of flowers. Cookies wrapped in bows, shared or devoured alone. Details and thoughts that last for longer than just instantaneous pleasure. I’ve always managed to live between two extremes. Living in a catatonic state of violence or softness. And, it took me years to realise how to balance out both the light and dark aspects of my personality. My life was once withered, and now, it’s coated in roses. Kind of like these blooms. More precious the light than the all-consuming darkness. The shadows in these images, the shadows in myself, wear darkness so beautifully. Meant for me, and me alone. The suffocating entanglement of wild, so beautiful, so abandoned, so delicate. Choking everything that comes close. Strangulations of floral, ivy, vines and opalescent blossoms. Each strand, competing for breath. Intimately engulfed within each other. Both beauty and ugliness, light and darkness, existing in all aspects of life.

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Vegan Chocolate Mousse with Cardamom Coconut Cream

Vegan Chocolate Mousse with Cardamom Coconut Cream

Underlined passages, fragments of happiness that traverse the body and raise bridges all around because elsewhere and in the wild blue yonder they say there’s euphoria.” – Nicole Brossard, from ‘Soft Link 1″.

This is home, finally! And it feels good. To be back, that is. I never thought I would openly profess that. I was contented with lush rolling mountains, piercing turquoise oceans, palm trees and pale sand. Efflorescent underneath sharp streaks of hot sun. But somewhere, my lifeblood was beating from a far different direction, and the life I’ve created at home, was waiting for my return. My desire has always been to escape and run, to be part of some kind of nomadic, aimless existence. And I continue to feel it over-and-over again. Never enough horizon, never enough experience. Call it a slightly romanticised perspective, but whatever. It’s universal escapism in its first and finest form. Exisiting is exhausting, and I’m still trying to live with it.

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Dark Chocolate Merveilleux with Honey and Lavender

Dark Chocolate Merveilleux with Honey and Lavender

“When I woke, the morning light was just slipping in front of the stars and I was covered in blossoms.” – Mary Olive, from Blue Iris

There’s always been a deep desire within my soul to run. I feel it in every fibre, every atom, every crevice and fleshed crack. To escape to unknown possibility, without destination or desolate end. Where the air remains warm, slow and unhurried.  To wander in a kind of nomadic existence, tethering on the side of both light and dark, fleeing to some kind of self-induced euphoria. Where she grows in radiance, impenetrable desire and luminous ecstasy, wearing her bona fide sins like stars that illuminate the endless night.

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Dark Chocolate, Raspberry and Nougat Ice Cream

Dark Chocolate, Raspberry and Nougat Ice CreamDark Chocolate, Raspberry and Nougat Ice Cream

I could be healed by the sheer courage of continuing to live. I could heal myself” – Anaïs Nin, Henry and June

I didn’t anticipate a lot of things about the life I’m living now. I didn’t anticipate how I could turn something I love doing into a quotidian lifestyle. I didn’t anticipate all the experiences had, memories created and the people met along the way. And I sure didn’t anticipate how I could travel doing what I love, often. 

The past month saw me travelling to New York, to the Middle East, then to Sydney. All-in-all, over a month away from home. The next few months will see me going abroad again too, back to America and then to Europe. It’s becoming a regular pattern, being away for extended periods of time. And even when I am ‘home’, it’s far from me.

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Chocolate Hazelnut Cake with Gianduja Praline Swiss Meringue Buttercream

Chocolate Hazelnut Cake with Gianduja Praline Swiss Meringue ButtercreamChocolate Hazelnut Cake with Gianduja Praline Swiss Meringue Buttercream

I was a winged obsessive, my moonlit feathers were paper. I lived hardly at all among men and women; I spoke only to angels. How fortunate my days, how charged and meaningful the nights’ continuous silence and opacity.” – Louise Glück, from “Ancient Text”

This years birthday cake. Twenty-one! The truth, I don’t usually celebrate. Call it elitist or detached (or both), but rejoicing age, another year older, has never been something I yearned for. I blame my love for American Beauty on the sort-of self-deprecating ideals that stem. The kind of societal ideals that entail certain life’s milestones to be reached within the perimeters of a new age. A kind of pursuit in identity and self-obsession, that always set my warped line amongst the straight. A good cake, that’s the extent I’m willing to go.

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Vegan Chocolate Chip Walnut Cookies

Vegan Chocolate Chip Walnut CookiesVegan Chocolate Chip Walnut Cookies

If I told you a flower bloomed in a dark room, would you trust it?” – Kendrick Lamar, Money Trees

There’s a storm going on now, its casting shadow amongst the corners of the room and unwillingly holding everything black until those momentary flashes of white light pierce through the darkness. Though, those are few and far between and vanish just as fast as they arrived, like all good things. I’ve always thought that storms were rather bold, half poison and half god. The kind of boldness that declares, “I’ll take control of your universe and give it back when I’m ready”. It might be kind of strange to personify a storm, but hey, I like it.

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